Here you go!

It has been a long time since I wrote something long and worth reading. I think I will try to change this now. It probably won’t be long, but it will be longer than a 140 character tweet. It already is… And it won’t be worth reading, for sure. Today has been alright I guess. I went to play tennis directly after school together with my sister and Jess. It was okay. I don’t like tennis. There are many reasons why I shouldn’t play tennis:

• I’m useless.
• I think it’s boring.
• I’m too lazy for it.
• I’m too fat.
• I’m too slow.

And here I am at home by my desk writing this with a cup of old cold tea standing next to me… I better clean up this mess.

Today is the last day with only girls at home. Dad will be back from Sweden tomorrow. I wish I was in Sweden now. I kinda like it when he’s away, we don’t always work well together. *cough, cough* If I was in Sweden I’d spend as much time as possible with Ida and Sibela. Though… I think Sibela is slipping away from me. I guess that’s what happens when you live so far from each other. I would not like to go back and have this undone. I would not be the same person if we not would have moved to Czech Republic and I like who I am right now.

I can’t wait for Sunday, I will go to Prague and meet a friend and we will go buy tickets to The Wombats! :D Two Wombats shows in a year. This is definitely my year!

So, here you go! :)

I'm a bad blogger

As you sure notice I haven't blogged in ages. I'm still not sure if I've missed it or not... I'm not hooked up like I was before. Talking about being hooked: I've really gotten into The Wombats lately. I saw them at Rock for People and, yeah, I fell in love. It's not often I hear some music and start dancing like crazy.

This summer has gone so fast and it's soon time to go back to school. (22nd of August, I think) It will be a hell. I really don't want to go back to school. Urgh. I just hope I won't get depressed again.

You see my mentor seem to have taken some sort of roll as my therapist. She says she knows what it's like to be in my age. On the outside I nod and so but on the inside I want to yell at her:

"YOU MIGHT KNOW WHAT IT'S LIKE TO BE 15 BUT YOU HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT IT'S LIKE TO BE ME. STOP ACTING LIKE YOU FUCKING KNOW ME!"

But I don't.

I think that's it. We'll head back to Czech Republic on Sunday. (not tomorrow.)

I wish I could tell you more, but I'm empty.

When life gives you lemos, make some lemonade!

I have spent too much time being banned from the wi-fi lately. This week has been okay. I dyed my hair yesterday and I like the result.

I know I've said on twitter that red hair is mainstream but I like it. I feel comfortable with my red hair and I'll keep it like this for a while. My grandma hates my red hair so it will be funny to hear her reaction. That brings up our next topic:

We're going to Sweden on Thursday and it's going to be a bad month. Living in the same house as my grandparents and my family without any wi-fi and if I want to use that wi-fi I have to go to my cousins' place and they have cats so I get really ill.

I'll try to spend as much time as possible with Ida and Sibela.

I'm writing a blogpost.

What have I been up to lately? Good question, sometime I wish I didn't have the memory of a gold fish. (3 second memory ftw! -_-) There are some Swedish people in our house. four 13 year olds running around. Yeah, that's ok as long as they stay away from me when I want them to. Tomorrow we'll be off to Prague in the rain... Will be nice, I hope.

On Monday, guess what's happening on Monday.

I keep what I promise (Sweden and etc)

What I'll try to do is to write down these two weeks without forgetting anything. We'll see how that works out...

Oh well, here we go:

It was Wednesday the 8th of June and we started off our traveling day with taking the buss to the train station. And I'm going to leave it there because hearing about the story containing bus, train, bus, flight, bus, train, car isn't that much fun. So we move on an skip some days of meeting family and stuff.

On Friday I took the buss to Vänersborg, which is my hometown even though I'm having a hard time calling it home these days. You see I never live there. Well, except when I visit people but I don't live there. Anyways, I met Ida, she's my everything and my best friend. (But I have on more everything and best friend, I'll write about her later...) The first thing we did was to walk around the town and meet up with Shannon (her friend) and Hannes (another of her friends who I have met through FaceBook) and Shannon was going to the hairdresser to get her ears pierced. Then we headed home to Ida. We talked for about a week.

In fact that's pretty much all that happened. We talked and just spent time as friends do. That's what makes everything perfect. We can be away from each other for a while and then just catch up where we left. I followed her to school and it was great, I love her class but it also made mea realise what I don't have.

To my other everything: Sibela. We met her one day and she was just the same like she's always been. Talkative and laughative (if that's not a word... well it is now... ). Oh I love her!

After that intensive week of being us I took the bus back to my grandparents' house.

And yeah, I almost think that's it. To be honest I haven't done much at all.

Well yes, one more thing, we went to visit some friends of the family and they've got kids in my and Embla's age (Well Oscar is one year older than me but Elvira is the same age as Embla).

Oscar played some boring farmer game. It was basically FarmVille but in another way. And then Embla and Elvira watched some movie and I and Oscar watched Grown Ups. It was a great movie! We watched it in his room and laid there on his bed and since I had a crush on hime a year ago I felt that coming back a little, but it's over now. I'm free again, lol.

Ok, I'm not going to write more, I'm kinda tired of writing. So I'll leave it like this.

Bye!

New things...

I don't know when I did my last post but it has been a while. You might have noticed the new URL. That's one of the new things. The second new thing is my computer. I got a MacBookPro for my birthday. It's not my birthday yet but it's like an early present. (My birthday's the 26th of June)

I've spent the last week at Ida's place. We had a great time. I'll write about that later.

I'm feeling really good, except the fact that I have a huge allergic reaction because I spend too much time at my cousins' house. But y'know, I'd die for wi-fi and xbox so it's totally worth it. I'm just a little bit worried about that some day my body will just say "that's too much" and I will get really ill.

I've also downloaded skype to my new computer so I can finally video-chat with people again! I've also noticed that this computer checks my English spelling. It's better than I thought, lol.

As I visited Ida I joined her in school, it was nice and so but it also made me realise what I'm missing.

Anyways, I'll write more soon. I promise! and then I'll write more about I've been up to and so on...

My feelings are more important than yours (2)

mum bought me this lovely scarf :)

I have to tell you that I've defenitely not been into the blogosphere lately. I can't tell you I've been busy, because I haven't... Not more than normal. I've got three more days of school next week and then it's time for holidays. There's really nothing to tell, my life has only been about finishing the last pieces of schoolwork and relaxing. I've been spending some time drawing though...

Ever since I was little I've enjoyed drawing. I think I'm finally getting into it again. Someday, when I find my old sketchbooks from fourth grade, I'll show you what I used to do.

Things are back to normal. But what is 'normal'

I press create a new post and the I'm not really sure what to write. I've had a lot of things to do and I haven't really wanted to write it down.

Firts of all: Coke makes me sick. From now, I'm only gonna drink Pepsi! and yes, there is a huge differance! Pepsi is first of all much taster and doesn't make me feel sick.

Yesterday I had a parents meeting in school. I'm not gonna tell you so much about it except that I hate it so much I'd rather die than go to another one! Why do I have to go through this two times a year!? Seriously!?

I drawed Frank. No, I'm not going to post the pic here... It has been all over my social networks and it's impossible to miss it. And it doesn't even look like Frank! No wonder noone like it on FaceBook.

I've realized how useless I am in English. I hate the fact that I'm not from an English speaking country. I haven't even been in one! (LIES! I've been to the US twice.) I also called my mum a carrot.

I'm getting used to Twitter now. I've been totally additicted for one and a half month and I don't see how I could survive without it before.

I've just found an old memorycard with photos from last summer and I'm pretty much in ecstasy because it brings back some great memories. Maybe I should make a post with only photos from last summer :') *tears of joy* I miss my Ida so much! *cries*

That has to be it folks!

If you could choose who you want to be, would you choose yoursefl?

Hi everybody!

I've been away for a while. Blogger hasn't been working for me in a couple of days. The latest couple of days have been good and so has the weekend. Sunday evening was the only time I was feeling really bad. I'm not quite sure what to say... so here's a small list of what I've been up to these days:

• I've finally bought the ticket to Rock for People. I'm going there with Lada. a person on facebook told me she wasn't going because Czech people think MCR is emo and are going to throw tomatoes and eggs on them... If someone does I'll smahs their faces! Trust me!
• I've been out on a bike trip around Pardubice. It was nice.
• I didn't play touch rugby last weekend, wich was pretty sad. Noone showed up!
• It's snowing white stuff from the trees that makes me sneeze.
• I change the name and the URL to the blog, you might have noticed... I'm who6 again.
• I'm Freja again. After that Dylan said he love my name I couldn't help liking it too. lol. And I am the godess of love accoring to the Nordic Mythology!
• I fell off the chair three times last night when I was talking to Pixie and Ali. Are they funny or are they funny?

I think that's pretty much it. I'm have to get back in the blogosphere soon again.

Not today thoguh...

Bye!

A little bit of yesterday...

Yesterday was one of the most random days in my life, nothing seemed to go as planned...

I ended 45 minutes earlier because... I'm not quite sure... I stayed in town because I was going to the hairdresser at 3:30pm. I went to McDonalds because I had to ahve something to eat or I'd die and I got a hamburger (I hate McDonalds ><) and blah, blah. They give away free mugs over there! Then I still had some time over until I was going to the hairdresser so I walked really slow but I'm a little bit weird so I speed up without knowing it. So I walked around the block a couple of times before I went into the hairdresser (10 minutes before the time I had booked ><) but she was alright with that and I said what colour I wanted (Well I didn't say "sassy, Gerard Way red" but I told her I wanted it really red) but she didn't have the colour I wanted so I got some less intensive red colour. But I went like "What the hell...?" and she dyed darker red, wich I'm pretty pleased with but then she styled it really weird so I looked like someone from the seventies. (asdfghjklWTF?!?!?!) Then when I was done I walked to the busstation and waited for the next no12 and I jumped on it and enjoyed the ride. Not very much. I almost fell over three times in the corners. lol. As the bus got to Cerna za Bory it didn't want to go any longer and I had to get off. From Cerna za Bory it's a 2 km walk to my village. Nice. So, still looking like someone from the eventies I walked home. With my earphones plugged in and Kill All Your Friend on replay I walked... And got home. Finally! I thought and found my mum and my sister in the garden, sitting in the sun eating chocolate... What a family I've got, huh? Then I "studied" for a while... Which was horribly boring so I did as always and spent the evening on Twitter.

Later on the eveing Seden faced Germany in the quarter final and I watched it. But only the first two periods I had to go to bed. I found out next moring that Sweden had won with 5:2. I want to belive in the Swedish boys this year. If they'd claim the gold medal I'll cry! but first they'll have to face Czech Republic. Oh no, now my personality will get split again. As it does every single time Sweden faces Czech Republic. I'd get really happy if the Czechs would win this year again too but I belive in the Swedes this year and I want them to win more. (I know that Ida has stopped reading now... heh xD)

I've told you that music is my drug, but now I've got a new drug-dealer. Lol, Ida, I love all the songs you sent me! I'll soon be needing more *evilface*

I slow did a huge misstake the last day and promised Robin that I'd let him dye my hair brown >< (fanfanfanfanfanfanfan I don't look good in brown hair) lol, but I gues I'll have to keep my promises to him. I broke one of them two days ago.

I look weird nowadays. Fact. ;)

I'll talk to you later...

I've got some bad habbits

I put on some make-up...

Today was great, I got home happy and mum had made some good food and I was really happy and so on... I went up to the computer and found an e-mail from my friend filled with goodies and as I sat here trying to study, I put on some make-up beacue I was bored and then Frank tweeted (and my whole timeline gets raped, lol) and somehow when I read the name Frank Iero I began to cry, still not sure why. I feel really empty right now and I did something I've told myself that I'd never ever do again. It's just that I can controll the physical pain but not the mental pain. Hope that my mum won't notice and I'll have to wear long sleeves tomorrow.

Things are under controll, I know that you'll think I'm really fucked up but I promise it won't happen again! Oh, and how are you gonna know I'll keep that promise, well, I'm not sure I will though.

I hope noone will find this and go like "You fucking emo" fisrt of all emo is a lable and lables are for soup cans and second of all: This blog is my diary, I write what I want.

Please don't hate me!

Alright.

Tomorrow I will be off to the hairdresser and dye it red and cut it off. (I shouldn't be using the word cut.)

It will be the mistake of my life or the best thing I've ever done.

Here I go again.

I know I said I'd take away the blog, but during that moment I was pretty depressed and now I've decided that there'se no idea, I'd create another one directly anyway... It's a pity I can never be just fine with something, always going like 'bye this, bye that' hmpf.

I'm heading for the hair-dresser on Wednesday... I'm gonna have it SASSY RED and a bit shorter, I think I'll look good. It will be the mistake of my life or the best thing I've ever done.

I'm back in Pardubice after a week in Cesky Krumlov, sure it was a nice town but I seriously think I've seen one castle too many. In Cesky Krumlov we met a friend of my dad and it was pretty funny when he went like:

"Where did you study English"

And I went like: "In school, like everyone else... Why?"

"Because you've got a American accent"

And if someone says I've got an American accent I die. That's the worst thing that can happen. I was freaking out, trying to put on my British accent (because my Aussie one is not good enough yet) but it only got worse. So in the end I just shut up. I wasn't worth taking if I can't speak propperly. Uhm.

Right now, I'm trying to get myself together, I'm sitting in my pyjamas and it's 7:40pm, what's wrong with me...? and I'm not planning to do anything about it either. lol. Urgh another of these horrible blog-posts of mine, I'm sorry.

Urgh, the evening just got worse, I need to talk with someone...

Bye

₪ ø lll ·o.

New header.

Finally something I'm pleased with, I'm actaully fine with it for once.

I'm a little bit too busy to write more.

A blogpost

Life has been very fucked up the latest couple of days. Things have turned up-side-down in the matter of minutes and so has my mood. I've been tierd of people I love, I've said things I shouldn't say and I've learned things that are good for me. The week has gone so fast I can't belive it's Saturday eve and I don't think the time will go any slower now when I have got so much to do in school. My computer hasn't been working since Friday afternoon, I've been on my iPod wich isn't very funny. Imagine a small screen with the slowest internet ever. Not very funny indeed. And now 99% of all my My Chemical Romance pics are gone.

I've got some good news though. I am going to Rock for People without my family. To some that might not sound very good but to me it's the greatest news ever. So, I'm going with Lada, a girl I don't really know outside Facebook/Twitter but it'll be great to meet her! Oh that's pretty much what keeps me going nowadays, the thought of a MCR concert... I've already decided what I'll wear and what make up I'll have... I think I'll have Frank's X-make up... ;) cool, indeed. x_X

It's the 30th of April today and for about two more hours, lol. It's some tradition in Sweden to have a huge fire today (or sometimes tomorrow) and I got really suprised the first year down here that the Czechs has got the same. Anyways, the 30th of April used to be one of my favorite days of the year until today. Why? Because today I missed that feeling I've got every other year and it's so sad.

Today is so special, there's probably some old historical explanation but I don't really care, but for me the 30th of April means the first barbie of the year. No matter the weather!

I'm trying to save some money for the summer and I'll try and find somewhere to work during half my holiday just to get some extra money, first of all: It's always nice with extra money! second: I want to be able to afford something myself. All my money is from brithdays/Christmas and it feels weird. And by the way, I have to afford to buy some MCR-clothes too ;)

Back to the fucked up week. When did I blog the last time, Thursday? I'm pretty proud of not blogging like I did before and I have some deep thoughts about taking away the blog. I know tow people who will get so pissed off at me if I do so I will not. Even though I won't write so much. I don't feel like writing so much. I have to tell you, I've bacome a real Twittoholic instead and it's much more amazing Killjoys on Twitter than there are on Blogger.

Talking about that, I haven't found anymore Czech Killjoys. hmph, I think they're hiding somewhere, maybe there are too many dracs around in Czech Republic. It might not be safe here. *looking under the desk* things are always hiding under the desk.

How does it come that when I sayd I don't like writing so much I make these awful long posts? Urgh. I seriously have to keep my word sometime. I bet I never ever will.

I'm very untrustworhty.

Very, indeed.

Bye and goodnight!

Why don't you get a life?

Thank you dad, I love you too. -_-

If my dad knew how much life I've got.

I hate it when I get told off when I've done nothing wrong. I just sat by Twitter last night after I actually had done my homework and talked with a friend of mine and he comes and askes me about school and just something that I can't answer to and he goes mad. Thank you very much. I had to go to bed at 10pm and just leave the people I was talking to. Since when did I go to bed before 11pm?

Urgh, and what I hate even more is that my parents always try to say: 'No I'm not mad at you, it's just that...' and then later they often try to hug me and say something wise.

I went to bed at 10pm as I said and there was like a storm outside, thunder and lightnings, etc. and I've got my roof-window so it sounds like a drum when it's raining and the lightnings were lightin up the room ever second minute. I don't get scared of those things, I just think it's cosy. But unfortuently I couldn't enjoy it just as much as I'd want to. I didn't cry. I've told myself never to cry again and yesterday it worked.

Urgh, yesterday was such a great day. I was in the right mood wich made everything so much better. I fooled around during the footballtraining and these things. It's just when I get home and argue with my parents I get so depressed.

I dreamed about this cutie last night. Oh my Gee, I love him. But mum woke me up before I really got to know him. FML. How the hell can people say that he's not beautiful? Because he is.

Good bye Killjoys, on sunday I'll try and buy the tickets for Rock for People. I'm gonna go there no matter what. Even if I have to go there on my own. Like I'll be 15 by then, I should be allowed to go on my own and my dad promised me that if MCR would come to Czech Republic, I would defenitly be there.

Easter Celebration

A lot of different countries has their own way of celebrating Easter. In Sweden we eat many eggs (I hate eggs) and pretty much the same food as druing the Christmas, lol, except these special Chistmas things, of course. I don't know so much about the Czech Easter celebration but that the boys run around with their whips and whip the girls, I got so suprised when I heard about it, I went like: 'naaah, seriously?'

Yesterday when I woke up my dad told me that there had been boys running around our house looking for someone to whip. I didn't belive him because I was asleep and he always make up these things but when both my mum and sister told me he was telling the truth I belived him. What the Frank were they doing outside our house? (Frank - the new fuck, lol, I had a great time yesterday chatting with a new friend of mine that I've met through Twitter) I hardly know any Czech boys (or girls), lol.

I asked my dad: 'were they good-looking, then?'

'Yeah, I think so' my dad is weird c:

'Well then they were no friends of mine' ^_^

Miau, I need to find some more friends and get my social life going again. I really need it.

I've promised you a blogpost with photos and some words from Spain, I will as soon as I get the time to upload all the photos, it takes for ever, you know blogger. -____-

I wonder if one post will be enough, probably not. Oh my... there are looooots of photos only from my small Canon and then we have the big camera, the family camera and Roland's camera... and maybe some from Patricia's or Erica's camera.

Back to the Easter stuff, this year we didn't have any Easter dinner, the most Eastery thing we did was the my dad bought 25 Kinder eggs and we ate them all. lol, I felt so fat after. And all the toys, lol, they give the kids the shittiest toys ever nowadays.

Back in Sweden I actually wonder how long time it was since I celebrated the Easter in Sweden, most of the time we went to Norway and spent the Easter there and before that we usually visited some friends in Åre... (is that in Sweden? maybe it is. Oh wait, it is... lol.)

Now playing: My Chemical Romance - The Ghost of You

In the beginning I hated this song. I thought it was weird and their worst song ever. Nowadays I think it's one of their best songs, so much feeling and I only want to cry. If I fall, if I fall... down.

I should make a cover of this one. Sing it myself... I wonder... Maybe not.

I always get so off tpic, I'm sorry... back to the Easter stuff.

How do you celebrate Easter? Do you celebrate Easter? Why?

I celebrate Easter because of the lolly, I'm not religious in any way, and because it's a tradition, I bet in the future when I live alone I won't celebrate it at all. Maybe just eat more lally than usually. Why do I sound so fat? lol.

Some poeple actually celebrate Easter because of Jesus Christ. I adore you. I wished I belived in something that big myself. (Well, I do belive in My Chemical Romance...)

The weather outside is horrible, I hope it gets better in the afternoon... Well that doesn't matter, I have to study. I've got four weeks left this year and I would like to pass with OK grades. Wow, four weeks... that's soon. I have to finish everything. Oh my Gee. I've got so much to do!

DAMNDAMNDAMNDAMNDAMN.

Can deffently not write more. I have to study. If everything should be in the 1st of June I have to hurry.

Bye!

A little bit of trouble (FML)

Hi *waves*

I try and I try and I try but now things aren't as they should. I successfully crated a copy of every photo in my iPhoto libary (or at least all the photos from Spain) so I'm trying to solve things out but since my computer is an asshole and I haven't slept in over 30 hours so I'm out f energy and patient. It's too warm in my room right now and I think I might have an infection on my hand. I'm not sure if I'll fall asleep tonight but I guess I will... I'm pretty tierd... *walks over to the window and open it* aaah some fresh air... As you might have noticed I'm back in Czech Republic. Makeing the streets unsafe.No maybe not... By the shape I am in right now I wouldn't be able to kill a fly.

Naaaah, I think I'll have to fix this now and then I'll maybe be back with some photos from the holiday! *leans to the desk*

byebye!

Hey!

Hi all!

I just deleted the same blogpost for the fourth time. I hate this computer so now I don't try to touch too many things. lol. I'll write a long blogpost about my holiday here in Spain when I get home... It's great. Breakfast at 10:30am, lunch at 3:30pm, dinner at 9:30pm... I LOVE SPAIN.

I know I've changed so much the latest weeks. I bet it's twitter... lol.

I got so fucking happy yesterday when My Chemical Romance finally added, Czech Republic, rock for People on their tour list... I'm so going there on my own or with someone else... who wanna join me? ;)

I have to buy the ticket soon. As soon as I get back to Czech Republic...

Now I'll try and watch this stupid movie called The Forest. I don't get it....

Bye! ¡Adios!

PS. I've realised that during 2,5 years of studying spanish I haven't leaned a thing... Great. -_-

All The Unicorns Are Messing With My Brain - I've Lost My Phone

I've been so messy the lates days. I bet it's the unicorns messing with me. lol. No but seriously I don't even remember my homework, I'm not just not doing it but I'm forgetting it as well.

Yesterday was okay, first football and then we went to Paul and Suzie. I'm actually fine with spending time with my parents and their friends. I've sort of started to understand that I'll probably never learn Aussie English. *sadface*

I'm looking forward for this Friday! We'll go to Spain, as I've probably told you. The funniest thing, and scariest, is that on Sunday, when we're going home again it's not clear that we'll come home because of it's going to be a strike on the airport in Mardid. Haha, what if we won't get home. This will be interesting... I think it will work out fine. Otherwise you'll have to come and get me in Madrid.

I did my SCHOOL4KILLJOYS homework yesterday. I think it turned out pretty okay. It's not the nicest car in the whole wide world but it was... OK. I really need to buy some new crayons or colour-pencils. Everything gets so pale with those I've got.

I'm sorry for being myself, I'm sorry for wearing the clothes you don't like, I'm sorry for not being good enough, I'm sorry for not acting like a bitch, I'm sorry for not being the one you want me to be, I'm sorry for keeping it ugly, I'm sorry for not being pretty, I'm sorry for not being skinny and fit, I'm sorry for every true word I say about you, I'm sorry for not being the best student with the best grades, I'm sorry for you being so disapointed all the time, I'm sorry for not caring.

Well in fact, I'm not sorry for being myself, I'm not sorry for wearing what I want, I'm not sorry for not being good enough, I'm not sorry for not acting like a bitch, I'm not sorry for not being the one you want me to become, I'm not sorry for keeping it ugly, I'm not sorry for not being pretty, I'm not sorry for not being skinny and fit, I'm not sorry for every true word I say about you, I'm not sorry for being the top-student, I'm not sorry for have just OK, grades and I'm deffently not sorry for not caring!

Fanfic

(Everybody #SINGItForSniper)

Part ten

That morning was the first time I got a clear look of Idya. Her green hair still chocked me, in the city people had their natural hair colour or something simular, but it was more like 'Wow that's so cool' now instead of 'Green hair? That's so weird'. She had her sunglasses on most of the time so I couldn't see her eyes. She had a black jacket with many rivets and yellow pants. I fell in love with her pants right away.

The sun was shining really bright, too bright for me and because of the hangover I couldn't do so much. I tried to figure out somehow to get rid off the headache the only thing that helped was to stay in the shadow and drink water. Fun Ghoul came and sat down next to me.

"You know this is all your fault", I told him and pushed him a little.

"You can't take some booze", he said and laughed, "What do you think of her?"

He pointed at Idya, she was sitting and leaned her on a rock and looked really relaxed.

"I think she's cool. I wonder how she has survived out here on her own", I said and tried to figure out some way of surviving in the desert.

"I don't think she on her own, she can't be"

"But why would she be here with us in that case?"

"Maybe she's a spy"

"Don't start again"

"I wasn't serious", he sighed, "You know I'm sorry for what I did and said"

"Yeah, I know, and you know I'm sorry for being so spyish", I smiled and leaned my head on his shoulder.

I wanted to stay like that for ever but of course why shoud those moments last for too long?

"Shouldn't we get going", asked Kobra Kid. He was probably the most clever one of us because he had fallen asleep before the rest of us and missed all the drinking.

"Yeah, why not!? Maybe we'll find some dracs out there who wanna mess with us, I'll kill them all!" said Idya and we all got really suprised. She hadn't said so much during the time and now she was as good as in ecstasy.

We got going and I got to have a chat with Idya. She was in a great mood knowing that she'd get a chance to show what she was made of.

"So how did you end up with these guys?" she asked.

I told her the story about how I had ran away and got 'kidnapped' by the guys.

"...and here I am", I said and smiled, she looked at me with big eyes.

"You were actually going out in the desert without anything with you? I thought you were smart"

"Why does everybody keep saying that?! Like wouldn't you do the same if it was you who were stuck in the city?"

"No, I'd have brought some kinda food, and water. Deffently water"

I mumbled some swears and tried to keep a straight face. I knew that I had been so stupid just running away without anything. I knew that and I had a hard time admiting it and I'd never ever tell the Killjoys that I had done wrong.

I couldn't help likning Idya, she was just one of these people that made me smile. It was as if we had known eachother since we were kids.

"We should stay here, we're not out hiking, just showing Aly the desert", said Jet-Star when we had walked for about an hour. We were in the middle of some dry canyon and the cliff walls were reaching high up to the sky on both sides of us. The sun was shining down at us and I tried to look up in the sky without getting pain in my eyes.

"Can't we take a look aroud here first? It's pretty cool!" I said and truned around still looking up in the sky, "I've never seen anything like it"

I couldn't help it. The place was so amazing and I had to have a look around. The rocks were orange and I har to touch them to belive that they were real. I hadn't seen that orange rocks since I was five and it brought back memories.

I was like playing up an old film. Me and my brother had been running around and our parents had been yelling at us to take it careful and not go too far away from the small caravan that we had rented to go around in the US. My mum's lsmile, words and the pain when I tripped and scraped up my knees. My mum had kissed my forehead, told me everything would be fine and a minute later I had forgotten about the pain and was running around again. My brother had climbed up on a big rock and I was so angry because of that I couldn't get up as well.

I found myself staning with one had on a big orange rock and I felt both sad and happy. I shaked my head and tried to forget. I didn't have place for those memories in my life.

I looked up and saw that the others had started to explore the place as well. I decided it was time to take some thinking time on my own so I walked in teh oposite direction to the others, they wouldn't worry.

I found a really slim run wich I sqeezed myself through. No, it was no idea to try and find my way in the darkness and I went out again. I wanted to explore something really far away, something unreachable, something risky, something dangerous. Maybe I could climb somewhere.

I looked up and saw a ledge just over my head. I grabbed it and tried to find somewhere to put my feet. There was a small run about 75centimeters over the groud when I put my right foot and climbed up.

I stood there on the ledge and looked down. It wasn't very high. I wanted to get higher up and looked to my left. There was a smaller ledge that looked more like a shelf about a meter from where I was and it was a little bit higher up. I counted to seventeen and jumped. I felt how my feet touched the shelf and I stood with my face towards the wall.

This was easy, I thought and kept going. And it was easy, there were many shelves with I could stand on and I got higher and higher all the time.

I got to a place where I decided to stay. I hadn't looked down for a while and got a little bit chocked about how far down the ground was. I could see the others down there and they looked so small. I didn't want them to notice me, I felt like a boss standing up there. I looked where I had started to climb up and could see someone moving there. It was deffently not a Killjoy. I began to clmib back down as silent as I could. When I got closer I could see that it was a draculoid. Maybe I should have warned the others and told them about the pig but I wanted to know what the hell he was doing here and most of all why he was alone. It wasn't to the ordernary to see a drac on its own.

The drac was deffently sneaking around looking for something or maybe he was spying on us. Maybe he had been following us all the time. I had to hurry down but also take it easy, I didn't want to fall down.

I got down to the ledge I had started off at and looked down. The ground was one and a half meter under me and I'd have to jump. I counted to seventeen once more and jumped. I landed with a thud and scraped up my pants and knees. I mumbled some swears and got up on my feet again.

The draculoid was had passed by so he was between me and the others so I could just go over there and warn them without showing myself. I decided to follow the drac and try to figure out what he was doing. My knees were stinging really bad and I tried to whipe away some sand and dust from the wound.

There he was sneaking around as if he was some sort of spy, I couldn't help smiling. If he knew that I was standing right behind him ready to shoot any second. He went further to the others and I followed him, like a shadow.

The pig set off a little bit faster and he got really close to the Killjoys. I wasn't sure if I should shoot him or not, I decided to wait. If he did something it would be the last thing he ever did.

When he was really close he stayed and got up his gun. Now, you've gone to far, I thought and pulled up my gun from the belt.

"Hey, you stupid pig!" I sad, he looked up and I shot. I felt so coldbloody. I had no regrets but still so coldbloody. When the echo from teh shot had faded away the others came running towards me.

"What happened?" asked Party Poison and looked at me and then at the dead draculoid.

I told them how I had been climbing like a five year old boy and then had sawn the pig down in the canyon snekaing around.

Idya sat down on her knees next to the drac. She pulled off the mask and gasped.

"You've killed him", she mumbled, "You've killed him! You stupid! You've killed him!"

She wasn't mumbling anymore, more like screaming. I backed off.

"Look what you've done", she stood up and faced towards me, "you've killed him. You've killed my brother!"

I didn't know what to say. He was a draculoid, how could he possibly have been her brother? It couldn't be true. I could see tears coming down on her cheek, she wasn't kidding.

"How the hell was I supposed to know that he was your brother?! He's a pig!" I shouted. I was getting really annoyed. How should I have known?

"Why would a pig on its own walk around here? Think about that", she said and pushed me, "You're just a murderer!"

The word 'murderer' hit me like a face punsh and I got more and more angry. Why wouldn't she understand.

Idya sat down next to the pig on her knees. Now she cried more than before and I started to feel sorry for her.

"Just go, leave me here! Now!" she looked up at me and her eyes were filled with so much hate I couldn't look back. I walked away I didn't really know were I was heading but I just wanted to walk away from it. Leave it behind me and move on, I knew that wasn't possible but it was all I wanted to do for the moment. I found a small run in the rocks where I sat down and tried to forget. My mind was empty and I couldn't really think clear. Murderer. I had killed Idya's brother.

To be continued...

I had planned to write a really long blogpost with lots of photos from my phone so you could get a small look of my life. Unfourtently I haven't had time... I guess you'll have to wait for a week 'til next post, or maybe I'll have enough time this afternoon to write something... We'll see. It's pretty depressing to write these small note in the end of the fanfic. But what should I do? I've had so much to do in school I can't think clearly. I hope that maybe my attitude to school will change after the holidays...

So what are you gonna do this Easter holiday? :)